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Snappy Answers to Leftist Lies about OilBy Thomas Lindaman It’s one of the biggest news stories out there right now, one that directly impacts us on so many levels. If we don’t address this issue soon, we will be thrown into a depression that will take years to overcome. I’m speaking, of course, of the racy photos of Miley Cyrus circulating on the Internet. Oh, and there’s that whole kerfluffle over oil prices. Watching the news coverage and commentary about oil prices, it’s clear there’s more spinning going on than in Enrico Fermi’s lab, but I’m here to help. Whenever you have a Leftist spouting any of the lines you’re about to read, use the responses or a variation of them to confound and infuriate him or her. 1) We need to nationalize the oil industry. Remember the controversy over the horrible conditions at VA hospitals last year? The people responsible for that are who you’d be putting in control of the oil industry if you nationalize it. And let’s not forget that government isn’t subject to the laws of economics (or the laws of this country, for that matter…). When you have people who have no clue of how economics works with control over a vital resource, it doesn’t end well. 2) Oil profits are too high. This chestnut has been flying around for a while now, but it has no basis in fact. In reality, oil companies make between 6 and 8 cents off every gallon of gas sold, and they take all the risks to produce a gallon of gas. Government, on the other hand, takes several times more in taxation and takes no risk whatsoever. In other words, government makes a profit off oil companies for doing nothing, both in the production of oil, and in general. 3) Oil speculators are driving up the price of oil. Essentially, commodity speculation is betting that a particular commodity will be at a certain price at a certain time. However, that speculation in and of itself doesn’t drive the price up or down. It’s like betting on what the score will be in the Super Bowl. It doesn’t impact what the score is whatsoever, but it’s fun to try to be a commodity Carnac. 4) A windfall profits tax is a good idea. This idea was floated by Barack Obama and with good reason because it is a floater. The entire concept is based on a perception of what constitutes excess profits, and that perception will change from person to person. Also, if you tax profits enough, it will decrease the incentive to make profits, which ultimately drives our economy. And I doubt the good Senator has a plan to make up for the lost revenue from companies closing faster than a Wayans brothers movie. 5) We shouldn’t drill because it would take 10 years for the oil to get to market. I’d be curious to know how this number came into being because I don’t buy it. I believe if we left the oil companies to their own devices and gave them a more ambitious timeline we would see oil hitting the market much more quickly than 10 years. We have enough technology and incentive to make it happen. All we need is for government (and their pals in the environmentalist movement) to get out of the way. 6) We shouldn’t drill because there isn’t enough supply to make an impact. Not so fast. If we want to become energy independent, every barrel of oil we can extract from the ground and use will be a step towards that goal. If you’re dying of thirst, would you refuse a drop of water on your tongue? 7) We shouldn’t drill because oil companies are sitting on oil fields. Yes, the Leftists actually believe this to be true at the same time they believe #6 is true. But just like with #6, a little common sense dispels this. With oil prices being what they are right now, it’s highly unlikely that oil companies would be sitting on anything they could get out of the ground because it would mean more money for them. If oil companies were as greedy as the Leftists think and had as much oil as Leftists claim they do, that oil would be coming out of the ground to ensure they made as much money as possible. That’s called “capitalism,” kids. 8) We shouldn’t drill in ANWR because drilling would ruin it. You’ve heard the stats on this one, so I won’t rehash them. What you might not have heard is how oil companies have made great strides to reduce the environmental impact where they drill. While environmentalists and Leftist politicians complain about how bad pollution is, the oil companies are actually doing something to ensure they don’t pollute. As it turns out, most of the environmental problems connected to oil companies come from the transport of oil, not the drilling. With that kind of track record of actual accomplishments, we’d be fools not to let oil companies drill in ANWR. 9) Conservation is the key to the oil situation. Under normal circumstances, conserving a limited resource is a smart idea. However, the oil situation isn’t normal because we have so many people working against finding a solution. We have alternatives to oil right under our noses, but the Left has nixed all of them in favor of unproven flights of fancy that may make the problem worse. All we’d be doing by resorting to conservation of the existing oil we have is prolonging the day on which we’d run out of oil, and once that’s gone we have nothing to fall back on, thanks to the Leftists. 10) Biofuels will reduce our dependency on oil. It’s a nice idea in theory, but in practice biofuels have not produced the positive results proponents have touted. It takes more energy to produce biofuels right now than it does to produce a barrel of oil, and there is no significant positive impact to the environment. Given time, this could change, but right now biofuels are not the way to go. Energy independence needs more in the short run than ideas that might work eventually. Try these responses out at your next social function where someone uses any of the 10 Leftist lines I’ve documented. Please be advised, however, that neither this website nor I bear any responsibility for dry cleaning costs, medical bills, therapy, or the loss of invitations to social functions if you use these retorts. Please use them responsibly. Thomas Lindaman is a Staff Writer for the New Media Alliance, Inc. and NewsBull.com. The New Media Alliance is a non-profit (501c3) national coalition of writers, journalists and grass-roots media outlets. He is also Publisher of CommonConservative.com. Related links: |
